The Hate U Give

I stayed up late last night with my 11 year old daughter, watching the movie THUG: The Hate U Give.

I was so starving midway, there I was at 2am, air frying salmon to stay within my weight watcher points. Anyway.

It was an emotional ride showing all sides in the case of police shooting of a black man. It exposed the hard gangster life of the projects and a family’s desire to want more for their kids. It exposed the very stupid moves that fake-thuggers make that gets them killed by assuming cops. I was afraid that it was a little too real for my daughter.

So after the movie ended and we prepped for bed, I asked her this question. I said … what was the most important lesson you learned from this movie? And then I braced myself for the answer. She could have had so many. She could have hated the white cop for killing that black kid. She could have felt angered at the message that she should acknowledge life is unfair and just put her hands up. She could have hated black cops.

But she paused a while and then said … Chose my friends carefully.

I had to pause. And process that. Then I said to her. EXACTLY. You’re exactly right.

She identified with the main character of a Black Girl going to a rich private school. Because that’s who she is. And she drew her own correlations.

But you know what …

The Bible said … shun the very appearance of evil.

My Grandmother said … show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are.

I read … 2 cant walk together unless they agree.

And I always said to her … take that dam hoodie off your head or I will stop buying you those sweats you like.

I teach her that all lives matter but that her black life matters the most to me. And that’s why I support #blacklivesmatter. Because my color is the weapon that others fear. And I cant put it down. I can only only draw a smile on it.

And with that, we fell asleep.


Author: Adventures in Medicine, Autism and So Much More

Internist | Motivational Speaker | Blogger | Light-Heartedly Addressing Heavy Topics | My Ideas | Lively Family #autismmom #Harvardwriters #SoMeDocs

4 thoughts on “The Hate U Give”

  1. I read this blog back in March, and I had to come back. I grew up with drug abusing, abusive mother. I am white. I was hated and treated unfairly and I hated the term “white privilege” until I met my husband. I can’t speed anymore; he might get killed if I get pulled over. I can’t stuff my receipt into my wallet at Walmart; we will surely be asked for proof that we paid. Restaurants, stores, buying our home: every single aspect of life is different on the other side of the fence. Your daughter is beautiful and smart, like her mama!


  2. Wow…two awesome blogs…I was especially fixed on the hate u give…I’ve been purposely avoiding the movie (you are braver than you think). I loved her take away…it will keep her in many things. #blm #thestrugglecontinues cause #thestruggleisreal.


  3. Interesting article.
    Dr Nathanael Desire DO, CMD
    Geriatric Physician Consultant
    “Helping you keep your promise….of caring for your aging loved ones at home”
    Tel: (800) 285 – 2133
    Fax: (631) 749 – 5912
    Member of American Geriatric Society
    Member of American Board of Post-Acute and Long Term Care Medicine


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